AdScam/The Horror!

A life on the ocean waves...

You will be thrilled shitless at the news that Jeff Bezos has finally taken delivery of his $500 million, 416 foot mega-yacht (which costs $25 million a year to maintain.) It even comes with a multi-million-dollar 250ft support boat complete with a submarine and helipad for his girlfriend, Lauren Sanchez, who is a qualified helicopter pilot, to land her chopper on after a hard days shopping in the Rivera boutiques. Speaking of Lauren, the world's third richest man, has coughed up a few extra million for a gold figurehead that bears a striking resemblance to her.

And you need a third boat to get to the second boat.

Yes... It’s T.G.I.K.M.F. Again...

For your delectation etc... etc... etc...

 

 

Cruz goes cruising. But not in Cancun this time.

Taking a break from a much-deserved holiday in Cancun, Ted Cruz has teamed up with fellow Fascist, Sen. Marsha Blackburn to call for an investigation into AB-InBev over its collaboration with Dylan Mulvaney to flog Bud Light “Nuns Piss to a younger audience through the partnership. The senators allege that Mulvaney’s TikTok series, “Days of Girlhood,” skews her audience to those whose ages are younger than the Beer Institute’s guidelines. Surely though, when it comes to influencing young girls, shouldn’t Matt Gaetz be on the team?

When in Cancun it has to be Corona!

Well done DeSantis...

Today, Disney CEO Roger Iger and Josh D’Amaro, Disney’s theme park and consumer products chairman, showed that they were not bluffing with DeSantis, pulling the plug on an office complex that was scheduled for construction in Orlando at a cost of roughly $1 billion. It would have brought more than 2,000 Disney jobs to the region, with $120,000 as the average salary. The project was supposed to cost $864 million, but recent estimates have been closer to $1.3 billion. Disney had planned to relocate as many as 2,000 employees from Southern California, including most of a department known as Imagineering, which works with Disney’s movie studios to develop theme park attractions. All gone now, Ron. You really fucked that one up.

Mickey’s message to Ron... (click on it)

Gaetz gets gentlemanly.

Now, your favorite political fucktard, Matt Gaetz, is diving headfirst into the “Nuns Piss” farrago. He is defending earlier Miller Lite bikini ads that the “Nuns Piss” brewer recently apologized for by saying he didn’t think it was crazy to say that good-looking women in bikinis sell beer. He put extra non-woke icing on the cake by adding... “Nobody wants to buy beer from Lizzo.” The fact that she sports a somewhat zaftig figure has nothing whatsoever to do with it. I’ll bet his favorite video is the Miller Lite “Cat Fight” of twenty years ago. Especially the bit at the end when they slosh about in wet concrete.

At least they haven’t got the Nuns doing it.

Musk turning into a “Mad Man?”

It would appear that Elon “King Twat” Musk has reversed course on his declaration that “My shit is so good; I don’t need to advertise it.” Now we are told that at Tesla’s annual shareholder meeting in Austin, Texas. He said he is ready to “Try a little advertising for Tesla.” Remember when he tweeted “I hate advertising” in 2019—underscoring the irony that Twitter, which he acquired for $44 billion in October, is reliant on advertising dollars to stay afloat. “Here I am, never used advertising really before, and now have a company that’s highly dependent on advertising,” he elaborated. “So, I guess I should say advertising is awesome, everyone should do it!” What a pathetic wanker.

Turn right here!!!

Ad Biz Bollocks,

So, the big news of the day is that Pfizer has named BDHC, Publicis Groupe as its lead agency for its ridiculously named... "integrated global engine." Apparently this covers everything from data, tech, creative and media production, and fellow BDHC, Interpublic Group as its lead creative agency mish-mash, fuck-a-boola, following a three month review of thousands of BDA’s, most of which probably spent obscene amount of money chasing an account they obviously had no chance of winning. Not to worry, when AI finally takes over the currently anemic ad biz they’ll only spend tens of thousands chasing accounts they know they won’t win.

Data, data, data. Yum, yum, yum!!!

Porn Update!!!

Following on from my last post, The Washington Post has raked up some new information about Anton Postolnikov. Before he began his Caribbean banking career, he was an entrepreneur in Russia, running a now-defunct online car-rental company in St. Petersburg, then he bought Dek-Co, a London-based payments firm, before finally moving to the United States. In the past two years, he has invested millions of dollars in luxury real estate on Fisher Island, off the coast of Miami Beach that Bloomberg in 2020 named “America’s richest Zip code.” And here’s the really interesting bit... In March 2021, he gave $30,000 to the reelection campaign of Ron DeSantis. You’d think as a “Porn Banker” He would be donating to Der Obergropenfuhrer so could continue grabbing pussy and paying off porn stars.  

Hows that Presidential Library coming along?

Porn Pays!!!

Interesting to read over at The Washington Post... “Trust linked to porn-friendly bank could gain a stake in Trump’s Truth Social.” Apparently, something called the ES Family Trust has offered $8 million in loans to Trump Media in an unusual deal criticized for conflicts of interest. ES Family Trust is a somewhat obscure financial thingamy with connections to a Caribbean-island bank that bills itself as a top payment service for adult entertainment sites (That’s bollocky speak for “Porn.”) would gain a sizable stake in Der Trumpf’s pathetic media company if its merger deal proceeds. Oh, and by the way, the Caribbean bank is owned by a geezer with the name... Anton Postolnikov... Very Caribbean!!!

Does this mean I can stop peddling fucking beans?

Kate Moss shares her desires!

Ace AdScamer Lisa, she of the infallible Kate-Dar, points us in the direction of a veritable treasure trove of Kates likes and preferences in the financial Times special... “The world according to Kate Moss.” My all time greatest bit is the news that one of her very favorite things are a pair of Bottega Veneta printed-leather denim trousers. In other words, leather that looks like denim. A steal at... 4,390 quid!!! Which is almost $5,500. 

She could buy pre-scuffed Levi’s for 50 bucks.