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Today’s New York Times tells us that more than 2,600 Americans are dying from Covid-19 every day and that the pandemic has now claimed more than 900,000 lives. Actually, according to worldometers.info, the number as I write this is 924,530. So, you can expect to break the one million deaths barrier before the month is out. After all, according to MAGA “Morans,” only pussies get vaccinated... Right?
I believe in the freedom to be ignorant!
If you need further proof that the ad biz is fucked. News today that all the in-game spots for the upcoming Super Bowl have been sold ten days before the game, with some going for as much as $7.1 million for a 30 second slot. This is above the asking price of $6.5 million. And, as I have mentioned before, the vast majority of these spots contain big bucks’ stars and celebrities, so they obviously cost millions more. Plus, it’s a known fact that when your commercial airs, it's a fact that a big chunk of the audience has probably gone for a quick pee. Gotta get rid of all that Nuns Piss!
I’d pay $7.1 million for 30 seconds of George.
My... My... Talk about swings and roundabouts. Following on from my post yesterday about the crash of Meta stock. It would appear that Mark ZuckerNozzle lost a total of $29 billion in net worth in a single day. He is now only worth a measly $85 fucking billion. While fellow billionaire Jeff Bezos was set to add $20 billion to his personal valuation after Amazon's blockbuster earnings report. No wonder he can have the Konigshaven Bridge in Rotterdam moved so that he can get his giant yacht (It cost $485 fucking million, has three masts, and is longer than one and a half football fields) out of the builders yard and on to the briny for ocean adventures and shit!
Fancy a sail on my lil’ boat?
As I write this, early Thursday morning, Meta (Nozzle-speak for Facebook) is down over 25% on the NYSE. We are warned that this one-day crash may rank as the worst in stock-market history. Up to now, it has lost $200 billion. At current levels, that’s the biggest collapse in history for the market value for any U.S. company. Even though there’s no certainty the losses will hold. It will wipe multiple billions of ZuckerNozzle’s net worth. Couldn’t happen to a nicer fucktard.
This is not his Avatar. It’s actually him!!!
Burger King has announced a review for its $350 million account as its U.S. sales continue to sag. The fast-food giant is axing its U.S. agency David, which has held the account since 2014. Restaurant Brands International will also put its media account in review for all three of its major brands, Burger King, Tim Hortons and Popeyes. Horizon Media has served as the media AOR for Burger King since late 2013. Horizon and David will be invited to participate in the RFP, which they will no doubt do... Cos they are fucktards. Less than 5% of incumbents retain the biz after a review. Plus, they’ll burn through a shitload of money and discourage most of the staff during the exercise. Instead, they should take the entire staff on a cruise.
Oh, wait, that’s a dumb idea right now.
The out-in-the-open nerve and greed of former, twice impeached, President Der Trump is demonstrated by the news that he is charging a whopping $250,000 per couple for top paying guests to attend a “Take Back Congress Candidate Forum” at his shrine to abysmal taste, Mar-a-Lago resort in Florida this month. The event to be held on 23 February will offer guests who pay the quarter of a million amount a private dinner with Der Obergropenfuhrer, VIP seating’s and an “option to purchase a two-night stay at Ma-a-Lago during the forum”. On Twitter on Wednesday, the New York Times reporter and Trump watcher Maggie Haberman said: “$250k lets you pay in addition for a Mar-a-Lago guest room.” What a fucking joke.
He’ll throw in Ivanka plus beans for an extra $250.000.
Once again, I almost choked on my breakfast beer when I read “Why Lindsey Graham is going all-in on Biden’s SCOTUS pick.” On Politico. The article informs us that Miss Lindsey was at the garbage dump this weekend when he got some unsolicited input on his favored Supreme Court nominee: Judge Michelle Childs of the U.S. District Court for South Carolina. “Three guys in pick-up trucks came up to me and said she ‘seems like a nice lady. I’m tired of this Harvard-Yale stuff.’ The great equalizer is the garbage dump because everybody’s got to throw out garbage,” Graham said in an interview Tuesday. I’m sorry, I just can’t get my head around a picture of Miss Lindsey talking to ‘Bro’s” in pick-up trucks at the garbage dump. A sewing circle maybe, but not a garbage dump.
Senator, you take the Gold!!!
If you ever needed further proof that the world of BDA’s (Big Dumb Agencies) and BDHC’s (Big Dumb Holding Companies) is run by bean counters, news today that WPP WPP has appointed Simon Dingemans to its Board as a Non-Executive Director. His entire non-advertising career has been devoted to finance and the best ways to squeeze profit out of various businesses. Currently he is a senior advisor at global investment firm The Carlyle Group. Before that he was Chief Financial Officer of GlaxoSmithKline and a member of the main board from 2011 to 2019. MediaPost tells us that “He is credited with driving extensive cost-saving restructuring and change programs at the company.” You know what that means... Making the numbers irrespective of the employees’ welfare. WPP ChairmanNozzle, Roberto Quarta said Dingemans’ addition “will be invaluable to the Board as WPP continues its transformation and strategic progress.” As I said... You know what that means.
Jack made the numbers... For himself!
Despite all the fanfare around ZuckerNozzle’s plans for a cryptocurrency that was predicted to bring in ‘billions’ in new revenue, the project has crashed out with barely a whimper. Meta Platforms Inc, agreed to sell assets tied to the project born in 2019 as Libra and now known as Diem to Silvergate Capital Corp for about $200 million. After a fierce push-back from regulators and central banks, the project’s death was inevitable. No surprise that Facebook (OK, fucking Meta) continues to struggle to develop new services without buying them with its massive war chest. In a toughening regulatory environment, that doesn’t bode well for ZuckerNozzle’s grand metaverse plans, a dumb fuck direction he has bet the entire company on.
2022 Ain’t 1984.
Interesting to read that P&G’s Olay is teaming up with “Ebony” magazine to promote its “Decode the Bias” campaign. They claim that it is the next step in its goal of encouraging women of color to pursue careers in science, technology, engineering and math. It also helps focus attention on the role historically Black colleges and universities play in promoting these careers. Which is somewhat ironic when you consider that Olay was invented in 1952 by an explosive’s chemist in Durban, South Africa. That was, of course, the period when Apartheid was rampant in that strictly segregated country. The chemist tested his product on his wife and all her friends. Obviously, all where white. So, not much bias decoding going on there.
Explosives chemist... Ollie Olay...
