AdScam/The Horror!

Bezos’s billions shrinking!

Oh dear, Oh dear... Poor old Jeff Bezos just lost twenty one billion fucking dollars when Amazon stock tanked big time the other day. The company fell by more than 13 percent after investors reacted to Amazon's weakest growth in two decades. There has also been a warning the company could suffer a further slowdown. So far this year, Bezos has lost $40 billion, leaving him with a paltry net worth of $152 billion. Poor bugger doesn’t know where his next Dildo rocket is coming from.

And gold ain’t cheap!

Making money being stupid.

It’s no wonder ad people are held in lower regard than secondhand car dealers, ambulance chasers and snake oil sellers in general when you read that KFC’s agency, MullenLowe has come up with a brilliant new tag line for its client. For 65 years KFC ran with “It’s finger lickin” good.” After prodigious effort and much spending, MullenLowe has come up with “That’s finger likin’ good.” Yes, you can’t make this shit up. A new campaign will sport the new slogan. A KFC spokes-hack tells us that the thinking behind the switch was that instead of celebrating the brand’s food, the slogan is instead celebrating consumers’ perception of it. “That’s Finger Lickin’ Good" is the customer describing the brand. In other words, KFC isn’t claiming that its food is Finger Lickin’ Good, it’s instead quoting customers. It all sounds like a load of bollocks to me.

A word to the wise... 

Actually... It’s Friday today.

Loyal AdScamer’s will have noticed that my post yesterday “Yes, it’s Friday” provides further proof that my brain is turning into porridge. All those Mad Man years of unlimited booze, fags, sex, drugs, you name it, are finally catching up on me. My memory is becoming totally fucked. Still, I can remember which shelf of the fridge my breakfast beer is on.

Cheers!

Yes, it’s Friday...

Just for a slight change today is T.G.I.L.M.F. Which means “Thank God It’s Lila Moss Friday. Yes, Lila is the 19-year-old daughter of Kate. Who is now charging full ahead with her own modeling career, having just appeared on the cover of British Vogue. According to the New York Post she used to think her Mum was old and boring! Not on AdScam, mate.

The one on the left is “Mum.”

Talking shit...

As I have repeatedly said, BDA and BDHC douchenozzle management love to talk incomprehensible shit. WPP has just launched a 9,000-Large Tech Group, whatever the fuck that is. Here’s what one of the fucktards running it had to say... “We are passionate about the opportunity technology gives us to help our clients navigate constant change and achieve their growth goals. The future of marketing is outcome-driven, supported by audience-first planning and continually improving, AI-enabled performance standards. Through GroupM Nexus and our agency powerhouses Mindshare, Wavemaker and EssenceMediacom we are building a tech-enabled future side by side with our clients that is accountable to advertisers’ growth goals and to our vision for an advertising ecosystem that works for everyone.” Sounds like the same old bollocks to me.

Not well said, Sir!

More Trump Trials...

We are told by CNN Business that “Trump SPAC is down 44% since Elon Musk disclosed Twitter stake.” Shares of Digital World Acquisition Corporation, the controversial blank-check firm that plans to merge with Trump Media & Technology Group, fell 13% on Monday to close at $35.71. That's the lowest level since the Trump deal was announced last October. Der Trumpf weighed in on the issue on Monday, telling Fox News he will not return to Twitter despite Musk's takeover. "I am not going on Twitter, I am going to stay on Truth," Which is funny when you consider he’s posted just once since it opened two months ago!

Meantime Trump Force One is grifting the dosh.

Billionaires Run Rampant!!!

The world’s richest man is now going to become one of the world’s most influential. All it took was 44 fucking billion dollars. Yeah, Elon Musk is now the owner of Twitter. And he’s taking it private. Which means he can do whatever the fuck he wants with it. I’ll wager my breakfast beer that one of the first things he’ll do is welcome Der Trumpf and assorted MAGA “Morans” back on board. “Cos he can do whatever he wants.

Mind you. Trump now has his own “Hugely” successful social media site (Sarcasm alert!)

Meanwhile... Back at the “Dumb-Verse.”

Surprise, surprise, MediaPost tells us that “Consumers haven’t a clue about the Metaverse.” Apparently 49% of consumers haven’t heard of it, and 27% know little more than the name, according to 2022 Consumer Trends: Metaverse & Social Commerce, a study by CommerceNext. Another 20% of consumers know what the metaverse is but don’t know how to interact with it, and a mere 5% are familiar with it and are excited to use it. It would seem that for many of the douchenozzle user’s, their main interest is buying digital clothes for their avatars. As someone points out in a comment, haven’t they been doing that for years with Barbie and Ken?

Better yet... Barbie enjoys the CokeVerse...

We’ll leave it at the door...

Over at Britain’s best ad site... “MoreAboutAdvertising.” There’s yet another demonstration of how fucked up the ad biz is becoming... “WPP to launch end-to-end online retail business Everymile.” We are informed that this is a company which won’t just create and manage web businesses for clients but deliver the stuff as well. Here’s the comment I posted... Bloody hell. Now the ad biz is in the delivery biz. Does this mean WPP employees will be riding around on bikes with monster back packs carrying Chinese take-out. What’s next… Repairing shoes... Sweeping chimneys?

Where there’s muck, there’s brass!

Happy birthday Liz!!!

Yes, today April 22^nd is Queen Elizabeth’s ninety sixth birthday. Shit, she’s older than me! Amazing really when you consider how many times Charles has crept into Mums bedroom with that pillow hidden behind his back. Coincidentally, today is also the 52^nd Earth Day. I remember growing up as a kid in WWII when all the school rooms had a map of the earth on the wall. The vast majority of the countries on the map were red. ‘Cos that was the color of the British Empire. Ah, the good old days... Apart from the bombs. God Save the Queen.

It’s also T.G.I.K.M.F.