AdScam/The Horror!

All the advertising that’s unfit to print!

Following on from his awful TV ad of a couple of weeks ago, yesterday Kanye West splashed out on a double page ad in the New York Times. As expected, it was inane drivel and would have no effect on the NYT readers. Apparently, he wrote the copy himself and it includes gems like this... “Dear Future, I still believe in you. We still believe in you. Even in our darkest moments, We believe.” As the letter “W” is capitalized, Kanye is referring to himself in the royal fashion. This gem of advertising probably cost him close to half a million dollars for the buy... But fuck it. That’s chump change for Kanye. All he has to do is sell more of his pathetic clothing line and his mind numbing music to the douchenozzles that love him (‘Cos, he’s God) and the coffers are re-charged.

White cotton tee by Kanye... Yours for $200.

Krazy Kanye’s Kuckoo Gift for Kim.

Two days after Kim “Check out my arse” Kardashian was ridiculed for sharing photos on social media from her 40th birthday bash on a private island during a global pandemic, she has now shared with her “Moran” followers the truly fucked-up gift she received from her insane, wanna be POTUS husband, Kanye West. “For my birthday, Kanye got me the most thoughtful gift of a lifetime. A special surprise from heaven. A hologram of my dad. It is so lifelike! We watched it over and over, filled with emotion,” Kardashian tweeted. Remember, Robert Kardashian, was one of O.J.s defense lawyers. And here’s the best bit... At one point in the hologram, the dead dad tells her... “You married the most, most, most, most, most, genius in the whole world, Kanye West!” And I always thought Der Trumpf was the most, most, most, most genius in the world.

It takes a genius to know a genius... But which one?

Meet Captain Trump-phony.

Senator Mike Lee of Utah stood next to Der Trumpf at a MEGA “Moran” Arizona rally on Wednesday and urged the mask less and packed Mormon “Moran” mob to vote for Der Obergropenfuhrer next week, describing him as “Captain Moroni.” No, this isn’t some Marvel comic book character, it’s a reference to an ancient military commander in the Book of Mormon who inspired soldiers to fight for their freedom. “To my Mormon friends, my Latter-day Saint friends,” Lee, R-Utah, said as he pointed to Trump standing by his side, “think of him as Captain Moroni. He seeks not power, but to pull it down.” And I always thought the only things he really wants to pull down are women’s panties in changing rooms.

 

He’d better not come near my knickers!!!

 

Will work for... Scraps...

Over at MediaPost, we are told that... Analysts at Forrester estimate U.S. agencies will shed 52,000 jobs through 2021, and the major holding companies will lay off or furlough 49,000 employees globally. The flood of creative talent into the marketplace will spur a new wave of entrepreneurs as many establish their own businesses that deliver agency and marketing services. Oh no it won’t. Forget all this entrepreneurial bullshit. It will mean that there will be such a wave of unemployed talent, the poor buggers will work for food stamps. ‘Cos the competition for the few freelance spots available will be fierce. Obviously, agency senior management will be unaffected... ‘Cos that’s the way the BDA world works.

You could always take up another trade...

MAGA Wins MMYA... Not!

Did you see that at one of his MAGA coronavirus spreading rallies in Michigan yesterday, Der Trumpf announced to the crowd that he has been in love with Michigan ever since he won the “Michigan Man of the Year” award twelve years ago. Turns out there is no such a thing as the “Michigan Man of the Year” award. Not now, not twelve years ago. As expected, the MAGA “Morans” applauded. You can’t make this shit up.

He does... All the time!

Forget masks. How about nose pegs?

I realized as soon as I did my previous post, as this will be the last Halloween Der Trumpf will spend in the White House, wanna bet he’s gone festive, particularly when it comes to the many fireplaces scattered throughout the historic building. Everyone knows his favorite gourmet treat after a couple of Big Mac’s is a big bucket of KFC. So, obviously, he’s sent Pence and “Mother’ down to Walmart to load up on KFC chicken logs. You will be well advised not to go near the White House ‘til the current occupant has cleared out his desk in January.

No more years...

Blow your Halloween bucks...

As you well know, I never miss an opportunity to take the piss out of all the fake holiday’s that people love to blow their hard-earned dollars on. In a normal year, America spends six billion dollars on Halloween, two billion of that goes for pet costumes and gifts. As usual, I nearly choked on my breakfast beer when I read that Walmart is once again selling a fire log that is KFC branded and smells like fried chicken. All of the promise of fried chicken, with none of the payoff. Your house can smell like a chicken coop that caught on fire, sprinkled with the Colonel's famous secret herbs and spices. Unsurprisingly, the log has sold out for the last two years,

What you’ve always wanted... Phew...

Merry whatever!!!

Why does America try and drag things out forever? Elections, basketball playoffs, holidays – real and fake. I was not surprised to read that Mars Wrigley and Ferrero are trying to broaden Halloween into a monthlong celebration. Mars Wrigley made a virtual app that lets kids earn virtual candy that can be redeemed for the real thing. Ferrero is working with influencers to help give tips on Pinterest. But the industry’s attempt to extend this year’s festivities goes beyond just October. Hershey’s, for instance, began shipping seasonal candy to retailers a few weeks sooner than normal to jump-start the season. So, in future Halloween will start on the 5^th of July and last ‘til January 2nd of the following year. Just in time for the month-long Super Bowl.

I'm celebrating Bastille Day for a week...

Scary news... Or, not!

The Halloween hoopla has started. All the big brands are airing spots with goblins, witches and talking pumpkins promoting rubbish products guaranteed to rot your kid’s teeth, whilst piling on the pounds. Although, I have to wonder, what with the coronavirus surge, how many parents are going to let their kids go trick or treating. Some will, after kitting them out with a MAGA hat and an AR-15. Anyway, it’s still five days off... According to Der Trumpf, the virus will be gone by then.

Don't forget the gun...

America leads the world... In coronavirus!

It’s just been announced that the U.S. has more confirmed cases of the coronavirus than any other country in the world. America saw more than 83,000 new infections on both Friday and Saturday after outbreaks in Sun Belt states, surpassing a previous record of roughly 77,300 cases set in July, the data also showed the country has reported an average of 68,767 cases per day over the past seven days, a record. Ya think the MAGA “Morans” are tired of winning yet?

I feel... For me! (Click on it)