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Now the news you've all been waiting for... AdAge reports that one of the major buyers of ads on next year's Super Bowl LII in February will be Anheuser-Busch. Yes, you can look forward to lots of "Dilly Fucking Dilly" on behalf of Bud Light. Wieden & Kennedy should hang their heads in shame for producing this travesty of advertising. No wonder sales of Bud Light Nuns Piss have been declining for years.
The wankers at W+K told me to "Just do it!"
So, I did!
Did you see that yesterday six and a half inches of snow fell on New York's Central Park, which was the biggest November snow fall in 136 years. Ya gotta love New York, it doesn't fuck around, it does everything over the top. When I lived there, down in the Villiage, I used to eat late at Florent in the meatpacking district (It was open all night) If you sat outside you could watch rats the size of dogs eating scraps off the hot dog carts parked across the street You could also watch the transvestite hookers flashing their wares. Yeah, that's when New York was great. If you're there tomorrow, pop over to New Jersey and celebrate Danny DeVito Day in Asbury Park, where he was born and raised. NJ doesn't fuck around either.
Fuck The Four Seasons. It wasn't open all night. And it didn't have rats. Well, none that you could see.
Over at MoreAboutAdvertising, there's a post about the new Burberry campaign that features several very high priced pieces of talent looking totally fucking bored. Here's the comment I left... I have no fucking idea what that was all about. What a waste of always sexy Kristin Scott Thomas. They should bring back Kate Moss. preferably naked. Don’t forget, Friday is Kate Day on AdScam. Tomorrow she will flaunt her Burberry Bikini!!! So, When I make a promise, I keep a promise...
Pulchritude in Plaid.
Yesterday I posted about the upcoming sale at Christie’s Post-War and Contemporary Art Evening of a painting by David Hockney that was set to become the most expensive work by a living artist to be sold at auction. ”Portrait of an Artist (Pool with Two Figures)” was expected to be flogged for an estimated $80 million. It actually went for $90.3 million! Unfortunately, I got knocked out of the bidding at $50 million. I'll just have to keep making do with my portrait in the attic..
Still lookin' gnarly, Dude!
If you hurry you can still get to New York for Christie’s Post-War and Contemporary Art Evening Sale tonight. Don't forget to bring the entire contents of your piggy bank as a painting by the David Hockney is set to displace Jeff Koons’s “Balloon Dog” as the most expensive work by a living artist to be sold at auction. ”Portrait of an Artist (Pool with Two Figures)” will be sold for an estimated $80 million overtaking Koons’ 2013 record of $58.4 million. David and I both went to the Royal College of Art. He was a year ahead of me. When he won the annual Gold Medal, he appeared at the award ceremony dressed completely in gold, even to a gold shopping bag. He was born within a week of me across the Pennine's in Bradford. So, he's a fellow old fart, and I forgive him for being a Yorkshire man.
The painting.
The outfit.
Sick and tired of hearing about the millennium generation and how today's marketers have to tailor their wanky communications directly for them and their pathetic lifestyle? Well now it will no longer be a problem, 'cos now there's "Monopoly for Millennials," courtesy of Hasbro. Millennials have long been maligned for their inability to “adult” — from avoiding marriage to quitting their jobs to travel. But perhaps most central to the millennial MO is the issue of property investments — of which they infamously have none. Now, Monopoly for Millennials has the answer... As it says on the box, “Forget real estate. You can’t afford it anyway." Players don’t win money to buy homes or railroads, but instead collect “experience points” by earning rewards such as a 3-Day Music Festival or going to a vegan bistro — because memories “last forever.” What a fucking joke... And the best part is... You can only buy it at Walmart. Yeah, that well known vegan hangout.
The "Data" explains it all.
AdScamer, Tom, Points us in the direction of an article in British Fascist Rag, The Daily Mail, about how JWT - UK - CEO, Jo Wallace wants to change the culture of the agency by firing all the white, heterosexual men, 'cos they reinforce the shops Mad Men style reputation. In an article last December she wrote: ‘A hell of a lot of people are literally sleeping on the job when it comes to diversifying their creative department beyond white, pale, stale males. Listen Jo, back in my Mad Man days, I did a lot of sleeping on the job... But usually with the secretaries. It's all in "Confessions of a Mad Man."
According to Jo, there's none of that!
Boy, I'm getting tired of seeing ads for Capital One. Every fucking Web site I go to has not just one, but multiple videos of happy smiling people having orgasms over what a great bank Capital One is... Listen you fucktards... Every bank sucks. Look at the vile tricks Wells Fargo got up to recently, but all banks do it. My bank does it, your bank does it, they all fucking do it. The key is to find the one that sucks the least. In the meantime, please, fucking please, stop the infantile videos.
You might be better banking in Nigeria!
According to a newly released recommendation, you can expect a "drinking checkup" when you visit the doctor. All adults, including pregnant women, should be screened for unhealthy alcohol use by their primary care physicians, the United States Preventive Services Task Force advises. For those patients who drink above the recommended limits, doctors should provide brief counseling to help them reduce their drinking, according to the new task force statement published Tuesday in the medical journal JAMA. That's it then... Further proof that everything is getting increasingly fucked up.
I'll drink to that!
Facebook was down yesterday, so millions of cretinous douchenozzles could not post cat pictures or tell us what they had for breakfast. In a statement, a Facebook spokesnozzle said the outage was the result of a "routine test." Oh fuck, that's OK then... It was just "routine." The best bit... Facebook wankers quickly rushed to Twitter with #FacebookDown rising among the site's U.S. and worldwide trending topics. It didn't affect me as, as you know, I am banned from Facebook for saying "fuck" too much... But not from twitter. They don't give a fuck how many times I say fuck!
Say no more...
