Thanks to Edward O'Meara for pointing me in the direction of the Advertising Club's First Annual Holiday Party. Apart from the rubber hors d'oevres and Gallo 5 liter box wine tasting, there will be a silent auction with prizes featuring one-on-ones with a list of Adverati Heavyweights. Check the link for the full list. Dinner at the Lotus Club with Rich Kershenbaum is appealing, cocktails with Eric Silver is OK, and spending a couple of hours in the steam room at the SoHo Spa with Mary Baglivo has a certain appeal. But what I don't want is oatmeal and eggs with a side of haggis over breakfast with Stuart Elliot As for power walking in Central Park with Linda Kaplan Thaler... There's no "Big Bang" there! But having said that, the penultimate bummer of a prize is going behind-the-scenes at "The Big Idea" show with "Diamond Donny Deutsch" because as I've said before, how can there be anything behind something that has nothing up front? However, the absolute worst prize in the entire list is "Sharing a Boxing Session with Bob Jeffrey." Now, don't get me wrong here, Bob is one of the nicest guys in the world, and having worked with him off and on for a few years, I love him dearly. But, the guy is a fitness freak. He works out ten times a day, doesn't drink or smoke, eats granola, drinks wheat grass juice and is probably in bed by ten every night. He will kick the shit out of whoever wins the prize... And you haven't heard the bad part yet... If you read the description of the prize, in small print, it says you will be fighting Bob and his personal trainer, presumably at the same time. Who the fuck is going to bid on that. Well actually, Donny will, because I'm going to bid on his behalf... But don't tell him. It's a surprise. 
Where the fuck is George Lois when you need him?