AdScam/The Horror!

Perf for Perves!

Today, super Brit ad site, MoreAboutAdvertising, has pimped my piece on sexist advertising from last week. As I point out in a comment, nothing demonstrates how sexist most advertising still is than the latest TV campaign for Surf. Titled "Perf with Surf." This appalling piece of shit comes from agency, Adam & Eve/DDB. As I comment... The agency responsible should immediately strike the “D” from its name. Bill Bernbach would have thrown them off the fucking roof of their old 42nd St. New York Offices. Perhaps this is this their version of “Think Small?” Or rather “Think Pathetic.”

My Surfing is Perfing!

Poseur Alert!

Back when I lived in New York, I used to work out at my local "Y" to make up for all my unspeakable non-fitness activities. Then, someone gave me a day pass to the Equinox gym down in the Village where I lived. I showed up wearing my usual grungy well worn sweat soaked gear, to be confronted by all these people wearing multi hundred dollar black work out outfits. Everyone had a personal trainer, some had two. They also wore expensive black outfits. Unsurprisingly, I never went back... Now Equinox is opening a hotel down in Hudson Yards on the West side... Rooms start at $700, up to $8,000 per night. Yes, that's per fucking night. Wanna bet all the rooms are black.

Equinox personal poseur par excellence.

It's the rich wot continues to get the gravy!

Did you see the somewhat un-startling news that on the day Der Trumpf's Russian money laundering fixers, Deutsche Bank, was laying off thousands of workers, senior executives at the banks London office where being measured for Saville Row tailored $1,800 suits. “That someone would let a tailor come on such a day is disrespectful,” bank CEO, Christian Sewing said in an interview with the German newspaper Handelsblatt. “In no way is this behavior in keeping with our values.” Am I the only one that thinks his last name is fitting? Get it, "Sewing" not to mention "Fitting." Fuck, am I clever, or what?

I say. Posh rags, Cecil. Thanks, Humphrey. I Just laid off a thousand serfs to pay for it.

I am shocked Sir... Shocked I say!

I had to laugh when I read the piece "Brands are 'Out of Touch' with American women" in today's Media Post's Agency Daily. Apparently, media and brands haven’t kept up with the evolution of women, according to Kantar’s U.S Monitor survey of Americans' attitudes, values and motivations. Listen you fuckers, media and brands have never kept up with the evolution of women. You're probably not old enough to remember "Slice of life" TV spots. Where two women would be sat in a kitchen (where else?) discussing the merits of different detergents in their never ending quest for perfect laundry. Then one would pull a 5 gallon drum of Acme detergent out of her purse, hold it up to the camera, then recite the obligatory words... "I always use Acme detergent 'cos it gives me a humungous orgasm" OK, not quite those words, but you get the drift... Check out these, there are hundreds more...  

Even Hi-Tech...

Fucking Amazing copy...

And the winner is......

 

Fly me to the Valley!

Here in the Fourth Reich, the nabobs of the media universe are assembled at their annual fuck fest in Sun Valley, otherwise known as the Allen & Co. Sun Valley Conference, or if you prefer..."The Summer Camp for Billionaires." The small airport at Hailey is choked with hundreds of private jets parked whilst their owners discuss their efforts to reduce other peoples impact on global warming. No sign of the "Wizard of Oz" (Rupert Murdoch) this year. Even more disturbing, no sign of "The Poisoned Dwarf" (Sorrell) either. But all the other usual suspects are here. Including Bezos and his new girlfriend, Lauren Sanchez, who is piloting him around in her helicopter. Am I jealous... Fuck yeah!

Where's Air Force One?

The attendees gather for dinner.

A word from the wise.

As a follow up to my last post, take a few minutes to watch and listen to the acceptance speeches Rich and Jeff gave when receiving the Cannes Lion of St. Mark award. As distinct from the vast majority of bloviating ad biz senior management, Rich and Jeff use not a single piece of bullshit, pretentious jargon, gobbledygook or the never ending deluge of verbal diarrhea we are constantly subjected to by the current practitioners of what used to be a fun and rewarding way to make a living. However, it still is if you are lucky enough to work at GS&P, SG&P, PS&P, or whatever it's going to be called this week...

Not to be found at SG&PGS&PPS&G...

What's in a name... Wherever?

I don't know why it took me a week to catch up with this (drugs, booze, sex - OK, strike the last one) but I finally caught up with the wonderful video showcasing the brand new agency in town... Silverstein, Goodby & Partners... After 35 years of being relegated to second place on the shingle, Jeff swallowed his pride, and probably a bottle or two of his fine Tequila, and did the right thing, demoting himself to second place. Nineteen seconds into the video, check out the truly scary shot of Rich and Jeff in their early years! As all AdScamer's know I am a huge fan of this consistently great agency. So, what's next... Partners, Silverstein & Goodby... That would mean third place for Jeff... As Zippy the Pinhead would say...

Naaaah!!!!

Der Trumpf's best mate is pissed!

God... I laughed so much I nearly spilled my breakfast beer this morning when I read in The Guardian... Officials in Saudi Arabia privately complained about the kingdom’s low ranking on an influential press freedom index, less than one year after the murder of the journalist Jamal Khashoggi by a Saudi murder squad. Saudi Arabia fell three spots in RSF’s most recent ranking. It is now 172 out of 180. Personally, I would rank it 181.

Fuck the press... It's all fake anyway.

Grumpy old man rant!

The news yesterday that the police in Copenhagen have arrested 28 people for riding electric scooters under the influence of cannabis and alcohol after they began a crackdown in the Danish capital on misuse of the scooters introduced to the city earlier this year, doesn't surprise me. Here in the US they are an increasingly dangerous fucking menace and the idiots using them should be beaten with a shitty stick. There's been one parked on the sidewalk outside my apartment for over a week. Every time I walk past, I kick the crappy thing into the gutter. Grrrr... Get off my sidwalk!

Although... I am prepared to make exceptions.

 

Talk shit... Do shit... Create shit!

For years, people in the ad biz have talked shit, placing great faith in their ability to throw around multi-syllable words that mean fuck all. Remember when JWT announced they were no longer an ad agency, but were now "Cultural Anthropologists." That didn't last long. Now MediaPost tells us that... ESI Design is hiring Layne Braunstein, cofounder-Chief Creative Officer of Fake Love (Is that like fake news? Does Der Trumpf know about this?) to work with ESI founder Edwin Schlossberg. The hire serves as a reunion of sorts as ex-competitors in the experiential industry are now joining forces. What the fuck is "Experiential?" We are assured that the work will be "future-forward and culturally transformative." Oh well, that explains everything... It's a load of old bollocks.

You "Experiential" is here Guv...