We are only a couple of weeks away from the Sochi Winter Olympics and already the weepy TV spots have begun. Top prize for puking douchenozzelry goes to P&G for “Thank You Mom.” Two minutes of sheer unadulterated shit. Speaking of which, the opening shot shows a future Olympian in diapers, if you look closely, the baby is obviously a future Kmart customer, as it has already “shit its pants.” We follow the kids as they freeze to death, repeatedly fall on their arse and even break their fucking legs. And all the time Mom is driving them on towards the Gold… ‘Cos then they get big bucks sponsors, and Mom gets a honkin’ great fucking Cadillac Escalante!
And wax your skis with Tide!