Former “Cockney Git,” now Lord Charles Saatchi, is divorcing wife Nigella Lawson four weeks after he was caught on film trying to strangle her at a posh London eatery. The well known patron of really fucking bad modern art and pimper of Damien Hurst, says he has made the ‘heartbreaking’ decision to formally separate from the television chef because she refused to defend his reputation after he was pictured with his hand around her neck at their table. Wow, what is wrong with the bitch? All Charlie did was try to strangle her ‘cos she complained about him continually putting his fags out in her food. Apparently, all he eats is boiled fish. Shark, maybe?
Can I get chips with that?