As you well know, there is now an app for everything, from how many sheets of “bathroom tissue” you should wipe your arse with, to how to recognize which STD you have just picked up and how long you have to get to the ER before your dick drops off… But no, I was wrong… Because now Durex has launched an SOS Condoms iOS app, that will deliver a ‘Johnnie” to you wherever and whenever it is needed. A map appears to help you locate yourself. You can then choose the desired product as well as the method of delivery – options include a pizza delivery man, police officer and tourist – with payment expected on receipt of goods. So far, Durex’s service is only available in Dubai. Yes, fucking Dubai… Obviously the place where a lot of frantic, unplanned and “I’m just going out for a few beers with the lads” shagging is going on.
Fifty three days, and counting!!!
Or, you could have it delivered by "Spiny Norman!"