As you know, I have always considered one of the great mysteries of the age to be just how the fuck New York Times ace ad columnist, Stuart Elliott, has got away with writing his pathetic column all these years, particularly when you consider that he seems to have a staff of dozens helping him churn out his five day a week, boringly, eye stabbing, rip my throat out, fucking inanities. For example, in today’s column he answers a pressing concern, something that I am sure has kept all of you awake night after night…
Q. This one has been bothering me for nearly two years now, ever since Kraft rebranded its product line. Why does Snackwell’s have an apostrophe?
A. I submitted your question, dear reader, to Kimberly Fontes, who is a spokeswoman in the East Hanover, N.J., office of Mondelez International, the company that sells Snackwell’s. “We’ve looked into it, and haven’t found specific detail on why it is included, but can confirm that it has always been there.”
Well, blow me fucking down. There you have it. Everything you could ever want to know about the ad biz, answered courtesy of ace douchenozzle, Stuart Elliott.
I winder how much the NYT would pay me to write shit like that... Yeah, I fucking know!