As I pointed out in my last post, amongst the gems of advice I gave to Faris, was good shit about changing his name from Fred Smith to something a bit more exotic. This way he screwed employers for the big bucks. I also gave the same advice to Johnny Vulcan over at Anomaly, who used to be lumbered with Josiah Oswaldtwistle before I straightened him out. So, when amongst my fucking barrage of wanky emails I get from people wanting me to print shit about them on AdScam, was this… Lowe Named Managing Director of Ogilvy One. Which I thought was a bit strange, as from what I hear, Sir Frank had taken his mega ad millions and fucked off to the the Members Terrace at Lords to drown himself in Bollinger. But, it turns out this is a different Lowe… And his name is… DASHER LOWE… Yes, I kid you not… In-fucking-deed… His name is DASHER LOWE… Wasn’t that one of Santa’s reindeers? Holy shit. His parents must have really fucking hated him. So, here’s my FREE advice to DASHER… Change your name to Fred Smith. Faris won’t mind, and the creatives at Ogilvy One will stop taking the piss.
It works for a reindeer... It's fucking dumb for a person!