Uuugahh... Uuugahh... Draft/FCB chaos update... Dive, Dive, Dive!!!

Spies tell me that the worst agency in the known universe is laying off 7 million dollars worth of payroll. And, as I hinted in my last post, this is not down to "Louie" deciding he needs new titanium barbells in his private "fucking" gym... It's thanks to the Interpublic heavies... Even Uber-Wanker Michael Roth, who have decided that in common with the rapidly exiting rats on a sinking ship... They had better disown the fuckers who are dragging them down. Word on the street is they're waiting to lower the hammer once the Stoli pitch is over. Which is really fucking funny when you consider that Howard is a part owner of "Effen-Fucking-Effen Vodka." of Julie Roehm fame. Speaking of which... Where the fuck is the "Rock Star" these days? It's gone awfully quiet out there!

Captain... We have to jetison the barbells... Or we're fucked!

Comments

[the lower depths]

if those figures are accurate, i'm not sure there's a life-boat big enough....

[Auntie Christ]

Does an Aston Martin float?

[bg]

Das Bloat.

[pat smith]

Where do you get the pictures? Almost without fail they are the perfect cap to your posts, and the captions make me laugh... "or we're fucked" indeed.

OK, your turn to suck my dick.

Seriously though, please share some of your process. I've wondered for a while now what's up the pictures you use and the captions that go with them.

[nancy]

George, you mention Julie Roehm. Now yesterday I parked my skinny little behind or big fat ass ( whichever you would classify it by) on a lounge chair underneath a clock (lap clock to beat) and thought now if only George had some cronies to take a picture of this clock at the pool.

I was wearing about one quarter of a square yard of fabric, too. Nobody wants to see middle aged flesh. Just those big belly daddies will have to be grossed out at the pool like they are grossed out by the likes of Julie Roehn, huh?

[R.U. Shitin]

According to my source, layoffs happening in NYC as we speak. 70 people. Any corroboration?

[someonethrowmealifevest]

layoffs have been going on all day. the usual - people with talent, people who've been here 20+ years. i have yet to see one douchebag clean out his or her desk.

fuck this place.

[R.U. Shitin]

That figures. Sorry to hear that. What's the total today?

[Auntie Christ]

Anyone with an EVP title? Thought not.....

[haha]

When will they fire that fat pig Jabba The Hut look alike named Tersea Fellows?

That woman, in addition to weighing 300lbs, is huge CUNT.

[Julian M]

Terry "Fat Fuck Fellows" is a cruel cold CUNT.

[dumdum]

speakin' of douchbag and 20 years, how'sa bout ted eyes???????

[MissDirected]

Actually Auntie Dale they have let go an entire level of EVPs. Becker's protected his boys (and they're all boys) but their just vps

[Amper Sand]

Nah, they won't let Eyes go. They'll probably give him a raise along with Becker.

[r.u.shiten]

Any high profile names or just line workers?

[Todd Bridges]

Is the Chicago office letting out the blood too? I hope this recession puts a nail in these fuckers coffin.

[dumdum]

i hope missdircted, that you ain't a copywriter. how many aunties we got around here? eye's prolly gets special treatment on the dumbells in the gym. wonder if our friend lovinglife is Ok, gee, hope so. hope the kestrel is good over there in the land o' the rising sun...hope they didn't take him out back the squid shack and make him commit harry carey.

[Geoff Thompson]

About 6 years ago FCB SF had a third round of layoffs. (This would have been when Rooney Carruthers was the ECD of the office.) That afternoon, someone set a conference room on fire. Any readers here from that era? Remember that?

[Tanner]

Teresa Fellows who is a world renowned heartless cunt survives.

Laurence whose child molester case when he was a Christian Brother tickling little boys' balls is about to come to trial and survives. Add to that, before the merger the most people he ever supervised was 300 in NYC. Today, He's in charge of thousands worldwide. Based on what?.Are you shitting me?!

Howard Draft who, at best, is an absentee CEO and chauvinist, survives.

If any of these three assholes were applying for a job at the agency today in the mailroom they couldn't pass the background check.

IPG announces it's trimming $7 million form the Draft/FCB payroll.

Rumor (this blog) has the axe falling on 70 innocents.

Who the fuck is the ringmaster at IPG for this circus? Dump these three assholes and $7 million+ problem solved. Put the Chicago FCB people back in charge.

Where are the fucking directors of IPG? They had better come to or risk a negligence suit from shareholders. Anyone savvy enough to have the directors' names and email addresses? It's time to weigh in. No fucking around. Peoples' lives are being ruined. What say we mount up the email charge, boys and girls?

[Clemenza]

Tanner --

Board of Directors list is at the bottom of this link. Doesn't have the email addresses, however.

http://www.interpublic.com/interpublicgroupinfo/management

[draftfcb_is_corrupt]

Tanner,

peoples' and families lives have been ruined due to this lack of irresponsibility.

[the lower depths]

as this is the last job Huey, Dewey and Louie will have, they will protect it like a chihuahua on a chalupa.

[Tanner]

Clemenza...

Thanks. I believe I will write a letter to each member of this august board referring them to AdScam along with some of the juicier quotes. When I have it written, I will post it here.